Snow is horrible when I have to work.
I hate it.
I don't want to go to work, but the snow will only be starting then.
I'll get in and start doing my shit, then I'll turn around and realize that the whole mall is empty.
I still won't be able to leave though.
No one else will be there, and I'll be standing around wondering when I can go home.
Monday, February 28, 2005
Thursday, February 24, 2005
This snow
Well, this snow is going to suck. I can feel it.
The day is going to start with snow flurries as I head into the mall. My coworker will probably think about calling out. Every shopper will think about staying home, and half of them will. I'll probably have about 3 sales form open till noon. Only a handful after that as well.
The whole mall will be busy thinking about what's going to happen. Whether or not the mall will officially close is up in the air. If the mall could stay open through nuclear winter, they would. Only after the poking and prodding of the anchor store, i.e. Sears, JC Pennys, and Boscovs, will the mall even think about closing. They'll probably issue warnings and such saying that they are remaining open. 15 minutes later, they'll probably say they'll close in a couple hours. 10 minutes later, the entire mall will be dead quiet. No shoppers. Most of the stores will have closed by then knowing that no business will still take place. What's the point of staying open if there is no money to be made?
I'll probably wind up waiting for a bus in the cold snow. I've done it before in a blizzard, and it's not fun. I'll pay my $3.10 for bus fair, zone charge, and transfer slip. The bus will probably be late, and run slow. I'll miss my second bus. I'll still probably wind up walking through my door at about the same time I would if it hadn't snowed.
This snow is going to suck.
The day is going to start with snow flurries as I head into the mall. My coworker will probably think about calling out. Every shopper will think about staying home, and half of them will. I'll probably have about 3 sales form open till noon. Only a handful after that as well.
The whole mall will be busy thinking about what's going to happen. Whether or not the mall will officially close is up in the air. If the mall could stay open through nuclear winter, they would. Only after the poking and prodding of the anchor store, i.e. Sears, JC Pennys, and Boscovs, will the mall even think about closing. They'll probably issue warnings and such saying that they are remaining open. 15 minutes later, they'll probably say they'll close in a couple hours. 10 minutes later, the entire mall will be dead quiet. No shoppers. Most of the stores will have closed by then knowing that no business will still take place. What's the point of staying open if there is no money to be made?
I'll probably wind up waiting for a bus in the cold snow. I've done it before in a blizzard, and it's not fun. I'll pay my $3.10 for bus fair, zone charge, and transfer slip. The bus will probably be late, and run slow. I'll miss my second bus. I'll still probably wind up walking through my door at about the same time I would if it hadn't snowed.
This snow is going to suck.
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Mall
I hate working at a mall. It kills the trill of being there.
I remember when I was a kid that a trip to the mall was a fun experience. We rarely went, so any time we got a chance to go it was an experience. Most of the time I just wanted to check out the arcade. Still, later and later, as I grew up, I explored other areas, like the CD and Video stores. Later, came the videogame stores. Still, I liked being there because I knew the experience wasn't going to last. I was in the moment.
Now, I've worked there for about 2 and a half years, and the nostalgia is gone. I don't necessarily dread going. I do work there after all, and now I get paid to be there. Still, I get no thrill about anywhere in the mall now. Whether I am working or not, I don't like to be there. There is no excitement left. If there is something I want to buy, I know exactly were to go. There is no adventure left. When it comes to shopping, I usually want to spend as little time in the mall as possible. If I am out somewhere, it's a different story. Another mall is like methadone to me. The buzz is there for a bit, but it's still the same so I revert to not wanting to be there.
Thanks to the computer age, I usually know what comes out and when preplan most of my purchases. Sometimes I don't go into a store without a plan, but then I can't make a decision on what to get. The impulse buy section of my brain is on the fritz. It works sometimes and makes me buy things like, Plan 9 From Outer Space, but other than that, not much holds my interest while in a mall.
I guess the thing is that I don't really go any other place to buy things. I am trapped in the world of convience. I know the mall is more expensive than many other stores, but I don't have the other stores right outside my work's door. Even when I purposely push-off buying something to get it at a cheaper price in a non-mall place, I usually forget about what I wanted because it's months later. I just need to get out more.
I honestly do miss the experience of being thrilled to go to the mall. It's hard for me to go if I'm not already at or going to work. I'm already there most of the week. Going there for something on my day off, just seems pointless when I can just wait a day or two and save the trip. Malls are a trap.
I remember when I was a kid that a trip to the mall was a fun experience. We rarely went, so any time we got a chance to go it was an experience. Most of the time I just wanted to check out the arcade. Still, later and later, as I grew up, I explored other areas, like the CD and Video stores. Later, came the videogame stores. Still, I liked being there because I knew the experience wasn't going to last. I was in the moment.
Now, I've worked there for about 2 and a half years, and the nostalgia is gone. I don't necessarily dread going. I do work there after all, and now I get paid to be there. Still, I get no thrill about anywhere in the mall now. Whether I am working or not, I don't like to be there. There is no excitement left. If there is something I want to buy, I know exactly were to go. There is no adventure left. When it comes to shopping, I usually want to spend as little time in the mall as possible. If I am out somewhere, it's a different story. Another mall is like methadone to me. The buzz is there for a bit, but it's still the same so I revert to not wanting to be there.
Thanks to the computer age, I usually know what comes out and when preplan most of my purchases. Sometimes I don't go into a store without a plan, but then I can't make a decision on what to get. The impulse buy section of my brain is on the fritz. It works sometimes and makes me buy things like, Plan 9 From Outer Space, but other than that, not much holds my interest while in a mall.
I guess the thing is that I don't really go any other place to buy things. I am trapped in the world of convience. I know the mall is more expensive than many other stores, but I don't have the other stores right outside my work's door. Even when I purposely push-off buying something to get it at a cheaper price in a non-mall place, I usually forget about what I wanted because it's months later. I just need to get out more.
I honestly do miss the experience of being thrilled to go to the mall. It's hard for me to go if I'm not already at or going to work. I'm already there most of the week. Going there for something on my day off, just seems pointless when I can just wait a day or two and save the trip. Malls are a trap.
Sunday, February 20, 2005
Catch-22
The past is a very weird place.
A lot of the things today are different from how they were when I was younger. I use the "I" because I'm talking about me. I speak so that I know that I'm really here.
Still, the past has both good a bad points. There are things I wish I could do over again, and get it right this time. I liked a lot of the people that I once knew. I don't speack to them all now, but sometimes that could be considered a good thing. The bad tends to outweigh the good though. There are too many things I wish I can forget. Wish they never happened in the first place. Most of which I won't even tell any body. I fear how the past will effect the present.
They always say the those who forget the past, are doomed to repeat it. Maybe that's why I am forced to remember the bad times more vividly than the good. If I forget the good times, then it's only fair that I relive those moments at some point.
It's a catch-22. I want good memories so that I know I did good things. Yet, if I remember those things that were good, good things are less likely to happen.
A lot of the things today are different from how they were when I was younger. I use the "I" because I'm talking about me. I speak so that I know that I'm really here.
Still, the past has both good a bad points. There are things I wish I could do over again, and get it right this time. I liked a lot of the people that I once knew. I don't speack to them all now, but sometimes that could be considered a good thing. The bad tends to outweigh the good though. There are too many things I wish I can forget. Wish they never happened in the first place. Most of which I won't even tell any body. I fear how the past will effect the present.
They always say the those who forget the past, are doomed to repeat it. Maybe that's why I am forced to remember the bad times more vividly than the good. If I forget the good times, then it's only fair that I relive those moments at some point.
It's a catch-22. I want good memories so that I know I did good things. Yet, if I remember those things that were good, good things are less likely to happen.
Friday, February 18, 2005
night
The night lingers on and the night remains dark. Too early for sunrise, too late for cars to pass by. The bars are closed and I sit in front of a computer. Leno prattles on in the background about something prescribed and unfunny. The audience applauds, responding to a Pavlovian response.
I need sleep. I need to drink more. I'm afflicted with a disease that keeps me from succumbing to dark urges. I killed that part of me. It was the fun part. The interesting part. The part people still talk about to this day. It's dead though. Gone away, and I can never have it back.
Things are different now. Parts have become happier, but the gloom still exists. I will persevere. It's the only thing I can do. More and more keeps getting ripped from my being. Flesh tears and soul sears. Wounds heal only to be torn open again.
I will sleep soon. I will lay in my bed and wish to submit to the REM. It won't come soon enough. It teases me. The dream is the only escape. The place where I am still me. Where I can be myself and no one is watching.
I need sleep. I need to drink more. I'm afflicted with a disease that keeps me from succumbing to dark urges. I killed that part of me. It was the fun part. The interesting part. The part people still talk about to this day. It's dead though. Gone away, and I can never have it back.
Things are different now. Parts have become happier, but the gloom still exists. I will persevere. It's the only thing I can do. More and more keeps getting ripped from my being. Flesh tears and soul sears. Wounds heal only to be torn open again.
I will sleep soon. I will lay in my bed and wish to submit to the REM. It won't come soon enough. It teases me. The dream is the only escape. The place where I am still me. Where I can be myself and no one is watching.
Wednesday, February 16, 2005
Gifts
My birthday is actually coming up next week. I already received my first gift for it.
I open my mailbox today, and there's a package for me. The lovely people at Marlboro were kind enough to send me a deck of playing cards. The funny thing is that I don't even smoke. I wound up taking one of them survey things while at a bar, one night, last summer, and the company sent me a birthday gift. How nice of them. I could always repay the favor, but I'd already have as many bad habits as I would like at the moment.
In other events, I have to try and figure out what the hell I'm doing about my birthday. I should do something. Last time I went out with a couple friends to a place that doesn't even exist anymore. Maybe I'll strike out again and close down another place unwittingly. Any suggestions?
I open my mailbox today, and there's a package for me. The lovely people at Marlboro were kind enough to send me a deck of playing cards. The funny thing is that I don't even smoke. I wound up taking one of them survey things while at a bar, one night, last summer, and the company sent me a birthday gift. How nice of them. I could always repay the favor, but I'd already have as many bad habits as I would like at the moment.
In other events, I have to try and figure out what the hell I'm doing about my birthday. I should do something. Last time I went out with a couple friends to a place that doesn't even exist anymore. Maybe I'll strike out again and close down another place unwittingly. Any suggestions?
Tuesday, February 15, 2005
Wow! The Things you learn.
What's funny is that I just now find out the meaning of this word:
(Actually taken from the homepage of Hello: where you can host pictures for blogging posts)
What's a Blog?
"Blog" is short for Web log, which can be anything from a news site to an online journal. Blogs allow you to instantly publish your thoughts and ideas from anywhere.
People all over the world have blogs. It's a fun and easy way to keep in touch with your friends, post links to interesting webpages, or just record your thoughts.
(Actually taken from the homepage of Hello: where you can host pictures for blogging posts)
What's a Blog?
"Blog" is short for Web log, which can be anything from a news site to an online journal. Blogs allow you to instantly publish your thoughts and ideas from anywhere.
People all over the world have blogs. It's a fun and easy way to keep in touch with your friends, post links to interesting webpages, or just record your thoughts.
Entry One
Well, I guess this is the first entry in the blog I just set up. It is definitely not going to be anything important or earth-shattering.
I am doing this because I think it's interesting. I've been reading a few people's blogs every now and again for a little while, and decided it could be a decent place for me to write some stuff people might actually look at as well.
Mainly, this is just to make me feel better.
I always wanted to write more, and Blogging allows my constant, misspelled typing to see some print. I don't need a reason. I don't need a purpose. Hell, most of the things I find here will probably just be borrowed and showcased from other sites and blogs. Don't worry, I'll give credit where credit is due.
I am doing this because I think it's interesting. I've been reading a few people's blogs every now and again for a little while, and decided it could be a decent place for me to write some stuff people might actually look at as well.
Mainly, this is just to make me feel better.
I always wanted to write more, and Blogging allows my constant, misspelled typing to see some print. I don't need a reason. I don't need a purpose. Hell, most of the things I find here will probably just be borrowed and showcased from other sites and blogs. Don't worry, I'll give credit where credit is due.
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