Booze Tears

Booze tears. It's what I got.

I had a weird night tonight. On top of my car giving me some trouble, my heart did too. Such is life though. I am surely an emotional being. I have never refuted that fact. I am seven beers deep and two yawns away from actually going to sleep.

I would like to say that tonight was fun. In a way, it really was. I spent some time with some friends I haven't seen in a while. Hell, I even saw the girl that made my heart go all a flutter a couple months ago. Don't worry, nothing else happened. I am too much of a pussy for that. Such is my life.

Fear was my main driving factor tonight. My car, my one true companion, nearly left me. A knocking sound nearly left me stranded many miles from home. The fear and worry pt a strain on my heart. I sat down and tried to watch movies, but failed miserably. They were even the Rifftrax versions. The guys that did MST3K produced audio commentary for various movies to breath new humor into them. I couldn't find the haha's though. Nerves kept my drinking in check and my suave-ness at a far reach.

After a safe trip home, the drinking recommenced. I had no trouble on the way home. I have a strange relation with my car. I want to hold it together through willpower. I actually think that works. It did for tonight at least. I didn't sense any problems. They are probably still there though. I just didn't want to be stranded so many miles from home.

I am not a solo drinker. I am not even that big of a drinker in general. I always say that there are certain nights that I can drink. Funny enough, tonight was one. Seven beers is nothing to scoff at in my opinion. I am not looking to win any competitions. I usually don't even drink alone. I have a weird aversion toward it. So, I am not much of a writer in that regard. Writers are supposed to drink. It's part of the initiation. I still haven't learned the handshake. Guess I need something adequately publish or read to get that far.

Oh well, I should get some sleep. Booze is coursing through my veins. My heart can only take so much. I don't know what I want. There admission is a sign of something, right? I just want to be wanted.